labrat - rest among the silt lyrics

when it's dark and i'm alone i cry for peace but they won't go.
and this is killing me but i can never let you know
it's more than i can take, i sink - i drown - i cannot float
and they keep pushing me the rope constricts my fucking throat again...
you don't know what it's like if you did you'd never want me
to be there - and if i made you understand, you'd have
it an you'd be in this mess!!!
dragged down to rest among the silt, i cannot breathe it's ???

[the rest of the lyrics are too hard for me to interpret]